Relationship problem that require advice from all the expert here

deathsyct · #1 04-12-2006, 11:33 AM

Hi everyone,

curently i'm in a wierd situation and i require advice from all the expert here. hope everyone can share their views.

currently my EX and i are still single. we still remain as frens after the break up. but the prob is that she still calls me up on my mobile & talk to me on e phone. so me being e gentleman juz have to accompany & +++ cok wif her. oso there are times whereby she still ask me out. but this is still quite norm as frens do go out tog.

e prob comes when she keeps sticking very close to me. i dont mind carrying her bag 4 her as it is our task to hlp gals carry em. but seems like she is nt shy abt it & takes it as though as i'm her bf. when out to shop her stuff, she will still try out e clothes and ask me to look whether its nice or nt. even when eating, she insist tat i sit beside her. so its naturally norm for me to start to hold her hands but she will pull her hands away.

anyway i tried asking her directly and she say its juz being norm frens. bros frm SBF i need ur advice. isit me tat is being too sensitive and got e wrong idea of is it her. all her body language & action juz lead me to think tat she wans to patch back but when being too close she starts to runaway again. bros do u really think she juz simple treat me as a norm fren? or am i over-reacting?

can everyone give me their suggestion or views to this incident? ty in advance.

patpat · #2 04-12-2006, 01:48 PM

does she still allow you to bonk her??

patpat · #3 04-12-2006, 01:52 PM

does she still allow you to bonk her??

jimmyccc · #4 04-12-2006, 01:59 PM

u really do need help.. look at all the duplicate threads u did...

@Wendy@ · #5 04-12-2006, 02:01 PM

yeah keep on repeating the threat, really irritating...

stephan · #6 04-12-2006, 02:01 PM

Dear Threadstarter,
u better pm Ah Sam to delete repeated threads. So far u r number 1 already (so many)... once u have posted, please check first before refresh n refresh .....

big dick · #7 04-12-2006, 02:05 PM

dun blame him now for starting up to 9 duplicate threads.. guess he too kan cheong about his problems..

maybe the ger wan to be a close frenz but not your partner.. sometime it is hard to adjust in the transition period..

cdr_bly · #8 04-12-2006, 03:01 PM

SBF a little crazy these days. Keeps on seeing repeat posts. Anyways word of advice, she taking you for granted, all the bf perks without the gf payments. A big no no in my books.

carnivore33 · #9 04-12-2006, 03:47 PM

Brother Deathsyct,

From your question, I do gather that you must be really young.. the answer to your question can be found in an instance.

As fellow samster patpat said, does she allow you to have a sexual relationship?

Try to invite her to a nice seculded spot and intitiate sex, then if she does not reject you, it can only mean a few things:

1. You did not break up afterall
2. She want you to be her fuck buddy

If she turns you down, then it all depends if you are willing to be the "Robert" a.k.a the "carrot top". If you are ok being her Mr Belvedere then by all means carry on with the usual boyfriend thing without the boyfriend perks (Ref: Cdr_bly)

Easy as 1-2-3
Cheerios!

ace7788 · #10 05-12-2006, 10:45 AM

so me being e gentleman juz have to accompany & +++ cok wif her. oso there are times whereby she still ask me out.
-> Are you acting just as a gentleman or have other intention? What is your real intention of holding on to this? When a relationship ends, it is good to have a clean cut. To me, it is difficult to draw a clear line.

e prob comes when she keeps sticking very close to me. i dont mind carrying her bag 4 her as it is our task to hlp gals carry em. but seems like she is nt shy abt it & takes it as though as i'm her bf. when out to shop her stuff, she will still try out e clothes and ask me to look whether its nice or nt. even when eating, she insist tat i sit beside her. so its naturally norm for me to start to hold her hands but she will pull her hands away.
-> Ask yourself, do you wish that she continue to act in this manner?? If you don't want, then don't join her lah. When she is able to cope or you are able to cope the agony a failed relationship, then leave quietly.

can everyone give me their suggestion or views to this incident? ty in advance.
-> Lastly, you can decide on your own. Don't throw the ball to your ex-gf or us... We can advise, but can't decide for you.

cheong_man · #11 05-12-2006, 10:55 AM

Bro deathsyct,

Who is the one who initiated the break up, was it you.

If it is you, probably she wants you to feel her presence and yet pulling away from you when you are close to tell you that you have to make back.

If she is the one to say break off, probably she is just treating you as friend so when you draw near she pull away creating a gap to differentiate normal relationship from BGR.

As for you you better search yourself whether you want her back before it is too late. Or if you don't want to go on dragging, make up your mind and get to the point.

#12 05-12-2006, 11:02 AM

I believe your ex-gf is using you to try to ease the breakup for her. She still need the attention of a man beside her, hence you are useful. If you have sex with her before, she probably wont refuse you if you make some advances in some secluded safe place. The next question is: Do you really love her? If you do, you may still have a chance to win her heart back during this period. If you don't love her anymore, my advice is to avoid her for both of your sake

Hope the baove helps.

analog539 · #13 05-12-2006, 11:28 AM

Bro Death:

Your ex is trying to have it both ways:
1. Dumping/breaking up with you,
2. No being lonely.

She can't have it both ways. I'm afraid if you allow yourself to me used, you'll get used.....life is like that. Unless she is still giving you bjs, which you don't mention so i assume it is not the case, then this will have to end. Just tell you you can't talk, you're deep into a computer game or something.
The sure fire way to end it is to have your ex find you with a new squeeze and your tongue deep you your new project's mouth right in front of your ex....she won't call you anymore after that.

Having said all that, maybe deep down inside you LIKE the fact that she still calls you.

Anyhow, there it is.

Jim

randyboy73 · #14 05-12-2006, 11:40 AM

bro death..

wait till you get a new girl friend and when your ex keeps calling you, then u will be in trouble man!

Better make your status clear rite now... are u split or are u together.

As bro hornivore33 (oops carnivore) said, she may still want you for the emotional thingee.. get it clear once and for all.. I am telling you this from experience...

Best if you spend less time together if you both want to break cleanly, revisit the friendship issue only after u are sure both of u have gotten over the whole thing and are now embarking on your seperate lives.

just my 5c worth of opinion

prince_81 · #15 05-12-2006, 11:41 AM

For me, Its the same. Clean cut. No such things as friends after breaking up. Even when they called, I wun entertain them.

Have to be fair to them and to me. Clean Cut. Only then you wun have such problems.

Maybe you should just consider rejecting her calls and outings; Just live on with your life. I am sure you got other friends or other things to do.

Thats just my opinion