Keeping A Mistress Abroad

[virginboy]

For the past few years, I have been going to China regularly for business trips. Instead of engaging in paid sex, I got myself a girlfriend to keep me occupied whenever I am there. She's not a KTV girl or FL. She was an admin when I knew her, and now she's working as a tele sales. It was supposed to be a short term enjoyment, but we're going into our 3rd year of relationship, and I find that I love her more and more each day as time goes by. It has come to a point where I need to make a decision if I should break off with her, so that she can find a proper guy to get married, or I should make a commitment to keep her as my mistress. Age is catching up with her, so it won't be fair to continue our existing relationship like this. She is financially independent, but I still give her some money whenever I am in China. I'm defintely sure that her love for me is real. She has actually many suitors, and a few of them are successful local businessmen, making more money than me, but she has no interest in anyone of them. I am not her first boyfriend, but she said that she didn't really have that kind of feelings with her previous boyfriend. She felt that I can give her happiness and is mentally prepared to be my mistress and will convince her parents to accept her decision. Her only request from me is to have a wedding celebration in her hometown, so that her relatives don't gossip about her status. I know that some guys have one family in Singapore and one family in China. I don't know if this is really workable or am I asking for trouble. I like to hear from brothers who have such experience. Thanks!

[LCL7788]

Bro

There are many things you ought to consider.
She is not a whore to start off with so thatz already a good thing.

But your situation is obviously not so simple.
Got a missus back here? Children? You do wanna keep these right?
Even if she's not a whore you have been her sugar daddy in everything but name for a while. This kind of r/s is not going to be healthy or balanced in the long run.
You want to be fair to her but you also need to be fair to yourself and your life here.
It all depends on your priorities and expectations. And hers. As well as those of the other people in your life.

Is the r/s going to remain secret?
What if your family finds out?
You cant look at the r/s just from the perspective of keeping a mistress. The other bits also matter. If not, you really wouldnt have ended up bonking her, si boh?
How long is the long-term you seek with her?
Are you prepared to do the shuttling between two 'families'?
You say there is genuine love involved but thatz not everything nor is it enough.
You have been together for a while so no harm thinking a bit more and being honest with yourself.
Keep things in perspective and all the best.

[sammyboyfor]

Originally Posted by virginboy

For the past few years, I have been going to China regularly for business trips. Instead of engaging in paid sex, I got myself a girlfriend to keep me occupied whenever I am there.

Why don't you forgo both and simply jerk off when the need arises. You'll save yourself a shitload of trouble and a ton of $$$ too. Unless you're stuck in China for months on end, it shouldn't be too difficult.

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

Originally Posted by virginboy

I don't know if this is really workable or am I asking for trouble. I like to hear from brothers who have such experience. Thanks!

Hi Brother Virginboy, things will spiral beyond your control and imagination when she's pregnant, wanting to surface.
Proceed with caution. Check your pm. Thanks

[ilovelife.now]

Originally Posted by Ichigo_Kurosaki

Hi Brother Virginboy, things will spiral beyond your control and imagination when she's pregnant, wanting to surface.
Proceed with caution. Check your pm. Thanks

I agree with bro Ichigo.. this is unsuitable in long run and will end up in her raiding your vaults and jewels in the end. Would say stop now after settling and better PCC.. safe in healthy way, saves money.

OR better go for girls if you are really desparate and can't control.
Pls share with all of us bros how it goes..!!

[see see only]

Originally Posted by virginboy

For the past few years, I have been going to China regularly for business trips. Instead of engaging in paid sex, I got myself a girlfriend to keep me occupied

Thanks!

Bro TS, come what may but considered deeply on the Consequences first.........

Second advice, When u start to love another apart from your wifey (or maybe even including wifey as well) : LOVE her 70% - you trust or believe 30% of her words ......... 80% vs 20% so on.......

Stick to the formula then you should not get hurt so badly......... chances are ...

[NightHawk88]

Bro Virginboy,

May I ask a question? Let said if you have opportunity to travel to many countries for business trips; would you mind consider keeping mistress in every country that you visit often; just to keep you occupied? For short term enjoyment; suggest that you go for PCC.

Now it seem to me that you are moving your thought from short term enjoyment to long term enjoyment. In that case, why not just bring your lawful wife along. I believe your wife would be more than happy to keep you occupied for all kind of enjoyment, no matter where you go.

Unless, if your wife are not interested in such enjoyment at all; only then would have no choice but to go for FL's as an alternative.

Cheers.

[Strawberry]

Originally Posted by virginboy

For the past few years, I have been going to China regularly for business trips. Instead of engaging in paid sex, I got myself a girlfriend to keep me occupied whenever I am there. She's not a KTV girl or FL. She was an admin when I knew her, and now she's working as a tele sales. It was supposed to be a short term enjoyment, but we're going into our 3rd year of relationship, and I find that I love her more and more each day as time goes by. It has come to a point where I need to make a decision if I should break off with her, so that she can find a proper guy to get married, or I should make a commitment to keep her as my mistress. Age is catching up with her, so it won't be fair to continue our existing relationship like this. She is financially independent, but I still give her some money whenever I am in China. I'm defintely sure that her love for me is real. She has actually many suitors, and a few of them are successful local businessmen, making more money than me, but she has no interest in anyone of them. I am not her first boyfriend, but she said that she didn't really have that kind of feelings with her previous boyfriend. She felt that I can give her happiness and is mentally prepared to be my mistress and will convince her parents to accept her decision. Her only request from me is to have a wedding celebration in her hometown, so that her relatives don't gossip about her status. I know that some guys have one family in Singapore and one family in China. I don't know if this is really workable or am I asking for trouble. I like to hear from brothers who have such experience. Thanks!

I do know how you feel but you have to decide for yourself and decision doesn't come easy. Stay cool and think properly...

[kimchi]

WOMEN--before & after marriage diffferent...like one bro has mentioned, all will be out of control once she gets pregnant.

[BMW X5]

Originally Posted by virginboy

For the past few years, I have been going to China regularly for business trips. Instead of engaging in paid sex, I got myself a girlfriend to keep me occupied whenever I am there. She's not a KTV girl or FL. She was an admin when I knew her, and now she's working as a tele sales. It was supposed to be a short term enjoyment, but we're going into our 3rd year of relationship, and I find that I love her more and more each day as time goes by. It has come to a point where I need to make a decision if I should break off with her, so that she can find a proper guy to get married, or I should make a commitment to keep her as my mistress. Age is catching up with her, so it won't be fair to continue our existing relationship like this. She is financially independent, but I still give her some money whenever I am in China. I'm defintely sure that her love for me is real. She has actually many suitors, and a few of them are successful local businessmen, making more money than me, but she has no interest in anyone of them. I am not her first boyfriend, but she said that she didn't really have that kind of feelings with her previous boyfriend. She felt that I can give her happiness and is mentally prepared to be my mistress and will convince her parents to accept her decision. Her only request from me is to have a wedding celebration in her hometown, so that her relatives don't gossip about her status. I know that some guys have one family in Singapore and one family in China. I don't know if this is really workable or am I asking for trouble. I like to hear from brothers who have such experience. Thanks!

Do you know what wedding celebration means? Your life is screwed forever!

[qsnake]

Women needs to have children to feel complete. Will you be there for her when she has a family ? are you sure you will still have frequent business trips to China then ? Children needs their fathers in their developing years, to deprive them of that is unfair to them, to say the least.

In her old age, will she have you by her side? she will have no one else then, her children would have started their careers, you will be in Singapore and she’s all alone in her old age. Don’t do that to her, bro.

If you truly love her, set her free. She will find someone to love eventually. Someone who can take care of her in her old age.

[sincere8888]

You better check with prc lawyer. If I remember correctly a wedding ceremony is enough to bind you as if u have rom in china . This means u will have the same responsibility like a husband after the ceremony

[GeMiNiZzzzZzz]

How unfair to your wife & the "mistress" that you kept.
I would rather you go for paid sex when your urge arises than you treat both unfairly unless you are SURE you can keep both happy either financially + company.
Decision ultimately lies with you..its just my opinion anyway..

[Roman city]

Bro virginboy, don't choose the woman you can live with, choose the one you can't live without.

[Royster79]

Frankly speaking, since she is not a WL, its very hard for us to judge also. Personally if i do encounter this problem, most probably i will choose to marry her.