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There is 1 chinese saying' Xiang jian how, dong zu nan' , staying together there are bound to have conflict due to different living habit, I believe bros out there whose living together with parents have experiences on these, fortunately for me my wife have always been understanding & give in whatever she can & I also discovered that vietnamese have a rooted culture of respecting the elderly & very good table manner, she always address my parent 1st before eating her lunch or dinner.
Yes agreed with u tat staying together bound to have some conflict. Tats y 1 party have to be the giving in party and try to change. As our parents are alreadied in their 50s, 60s, its hard for them to change. So we have to be the giving in party n change. We have to let our wifes understand this. I'm glad my wife is understanding and always giving in to my parents. Now, my parents also changed to more n more accept her.
Yes, agreed with u again on tat they have strong culture of respecting elderly. I remembered when my mum said something that is not good to hear, my wife just keep quiet. If for local modern gals, sure talk back. Like the case of my auntie n her DIL, now they sort of ongoing cold war.
by the way, I assume Viet spouse are not working in SG, even if they are allowed?
Dun quite understand yur question.
But i assumed that u r asking whether Viet spouses dont want to work even though they r allowed to, am i rite?
If yes, why wouldn't they work even though they r allowed to? Unless they have the thinking of being a tai-tai here after marriage. So far only 2 of the viet gals that i know who r married here r not working saying it their husband that dun allow them to work.
Here is my 2 dongs: if its the wife who dun wanna work, this said so much about that person. If its the husband who dun allow them to work, its either he is rich, or he is selfish. Its like marrying a "maid cum child bearing machine" lock her up in the house to cook n do chores for the guy n let him f end of the day.
By going to work, she wont feel bored at hm, can contribute to family income n savings for future child, house, etc. also the wife can learn more new things about living life in singapore. Yes, she is vietnamese, but she is still human being. We as human beings are social animals, we need interaction and communication.
Above are just my 2 dongs. No offence intended to anyone.
Yes agreed with u tat staying together bound to have some conflict. Tats y 1 party have to be the giving in party and try to change. As our parents are alreadied in their 50s, 60s, its hard for them to change. So we have to be the giving in party n change. We have to let our wifes understand this. I'm glad my wife is understanding and always giving in to my parents. Now, my parents also changed to more n more accept her.
Yes, agreed with u again on tat they have strong culture of respecting elderly. I remembered when my mum said something that is not good to hear, my wife just keep quiet. If for local modern gals, sure talk back. Like the case of my auntie n her DIL, now they sort of ongoing cold war.
Fortunately, both of us have a understanding wife otherwise we will surely become POW
Dun quite understand yur question.
But i assumed that u r asking whether Viet spouses dont want to work even though they r allowed to, am i rite?
If yes, why wouldn't they work even though they r allowed to? Unless they have the thinking of being a tai-tai here after marriage. So far only 2 of the viet gals that i know who r married here r not working saying it their husband that dun allow them to work.
Here is my 2 dongs: if its the wife who dun wanna work, this said so much about that person. If its the husband who dun allow them to work, its either he is rich, or he is selfish. Its like marrying a "maid cum child bearing machine" lock her up in the house to cook n do chores for the guy n let him f end of the day.
By going to work, she wont feel bored at hm, can contribute to family income n savings for future child, house, etc. also the wife can learn more new things about living life in singapore. Yes, she is vietnamese, but she is still human being. We as human beings are social animals, we need interaction and communication.
Above are just my 2 dongs. No offence intended to anyone.
I meant to ask if the wives of the men in this thread are working or not, assuming they can legally.
My feeling is the women would want to work themselves, thus I like to know how many are actually working.
Two of my cousins have Viet wives and the latter are both housewives. I guess we would best agree to disagree that a woman being a housewife is considered slavery or not.
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[QUOTE=vietboy;7241228]Dun quite understand yur question.
But i assumed that u r asking whether Viet spouses dont want to work even though they r allowed to, am i rite?
If yes, why wouldn't they work even though they r allowed to? Unless they have the thinking of being a tai-tai here after marriage. So far only 2 of the viet gals that i know who r married here r not working saying it their husband that dun allow them to work.
Here is my 2 dongs: if its the wife who dun wanna work, this said so much about that person. If its the husband who dun allow them to work, its either he is rich, or he is selfish. Its like marrying a "maid cum child bearing machine" lock her up in the house to cook n do chores for the guy n let him f end of the day.
By going to work, she wont feel bored at hm, can contribute to family income n savings for future child, house, etc. also the wife can learn more new things about living life in singapore. Yes, she is vietnamese, but she is still human being. We as human beings are social animals, we need interaction and communication.
Above are just my 2 dongs. No offence intended to anyone. [/QUOTE
In my case, my wife will certainly want to work, however questions who is going to look after the baby? We can just simply leave the baby to infant care centre but I always told my wife there are nothing more valuable than seeing our baby growing up process once we miss it there won't be any repeat no matter how much money we earned
Dun quite understand yur question.
But i assumed that u r asking whether Viet spouses dont want to work even though they r allowed to, am i rite?
If yes, why wouldn't they work even though they r allowed to? Unless they have the thinking of being a tai-tai here after marriage. So far only 2 of the viet gals that i know who r married here r not working saying it their husband that dun allow them to work.
Here is my 2 dongs: if its the wife who dun wanna work, this said so much about that person. If its the husband who dun allow them to work, its either he is rich, or he is selfish. Its like marrying a "maid cum child bearing machine" lock her up in the house to cook n do chores for the guy n let him f end of the day.
By going to work, she wont feel bored at hm, can contribute to family income n savings for future child, house, etc. also the wife can learn more new things about living life in singapore. Yes, she is vietnamese, but she is still human being. We as human beings are social animals, we need interaction and communication.
Above are just my 2 dongs. No offence intended to anyone. [/QUOTE
In my case, my wife will certainly want to work, however questions who is going to look after the baby? We can just simply leave the baby to infant care centre but I always told my wife there are nothing more valuable than seeing our baby growing up process once we miss it there won't be any repeat no matter how much money we earned
same situation as mine..i just told my wife wait till our son is older....
same situation as mine..i just told my wife wait till our son is older....
Looking at the topic of child care, any bros out there mind to share your experiences of leaving your baby or child to child care centre? Eg, the charges, services, child adaptation,etc. I believe the situation is quite common among all bros whose have baby or child, usually they are more sticky to mother whose sepnd most time with them.
Looking at the topic of child care, any bros out there mind to share your experiences of leaving your baby or child to child care centre? Eg, the charges, services, child adaptation,etc. I believe the situation is quite common among all bros whose have baby or child, usually they are more sticky to mother whose sepnd most time with them.
not sure abt exact price but a fren of mine told me its abt 400 plus per semester for putting at those hdb child care centre...and think its abt 2-3 hrs daily...
am checking out soon...will post here when i have more concrete info...
Looking at the topic of child care, any bros out there mind to share your experiences of leaving your baby or child to child care centre? Eg, the charges, services, child adaptation,etc. I believe the situation is quite common among all bros whose have baby or child, usually they are more sticky to mother whose sepnd most time with them.
My pair of twin gals went thru a few years of childcare. From N1 to K2, that's like 4 years of childcare, before proceeding to Primary 1. My youngest boy is going through it now at N1. I placed my gals in PAP childcare initially from N1 to N2 as its much cheaper. My oldest gal don't have baby bonus under old scheme but my 2nd gal has. So both of them were using the same baby bonus of my younger gal. As my wife is Singapore Citizen and working, there's a relief of $150 per kid. I cannot really remember what was the school fees like then, but its not expensive. At K1, i saw that my gals were not improving much as the classes at PAP were big, so i transferred my gals to private (Kinderland) . After $150 working mother relief, the school fees per kid per month was at $650. Baby bonus pay half, i pay half. Because the class size was much smaller, my gals improved a lot.
Things are much different now for my boy. After working mother relief, school fees is still at $1000 as i placed him under private too ( Learning Vision) . Baby bonus pay half, i pay half.
One thing to note is that when your child goes to childcare for the initial few months, he will keep falling sick. Once one of his school mates catch a cold or even hand foot mouth, the chances of your kid catching it too is very high, so be prepared. My boy has been in childcare since 18 months old as i wanted him to learn to be independent from young. Now at 3 years old, he's still crying sometimes in the morning as he refused to go school.