Wife & Sex - going through the motion

[asdfghjkl]

both likely its due to different background, e.g. local and a prc can mix well too!

[SpiceLarder]

perhaps... not really..... i am local Chinese married to local Chinese, and sex is typically 2 to 4 times a week. :P its nice.

[SpiceLarder]

feel very sad for you, tantan.... hope things take a turn for the better. don't be discouraged.

[notti4u]

Originally Posted by tantan1234

this thread is almost dead.

Anyway. My wife wanted a divorce nw, saying this is not the type of married she wants.

And she wants to bring away our child. I can't fight for that because I confirm lose.

Now feeling so sad, tat I can't live with my child anymore.



Even if I try to salvage, will i be kicking the can down the road? The can can never disappear. It is the character and the stuff she already did. The actions already caused the hurt and the drift.

I am thinking so hard. Shld I close one eye, or even both eyes so tat the family can stay, so tat i can do away with the dreaded paper works, the process, and to keep my child with me?
Eternity blinded?


What shit life throws at me!

Bro, dun be despair..... in what ground do u think she can win the custody of ur kid although the CCB woman charter always a problems for us.

If you did nothing wrong and the court will only ask u to go for counsellor once a week and see how to get back together.

Myself, I got two good friend call Rachel and Lovely (Right and Left hand) to help me to release when I need too. I do know that if sex is impossible, we have our good friends to help us and they never deserted me when i need them. Sometimes better than the hole hahaha...Joke aside.

Take things easy and who knows she might change her heart after seeing the counsellor or talking to her?

You might want to let her see this articles from Asiaone
http://www.yourhealth.com.sg/content...apist/page/0/0

[tantan1234]

Originally Posted by notti4u

Bro, dun be despair..... in what ground do u think she can win the custody of ur kid although the CCB woman charter always a problems for us.

She makes more money than me, and the fact woman gets custody.


When she told me she has zero feelings for me, I was so knocked out. To be frank my feelings towards her has gone dwn too.
but instead of feeling relief or happy abt my freedom, i feel one kind.

Lost feelings, maybe just feel wasted why relations become like tat, and the process can be painful. Imagine when see her move out her stuff, and the wedding photos.

I don kw hw I shld feel anymore. But to salvage is also painful, characters cant change, some stuff and words she said already cracked the feelings I had for her.

If I managed to salvaged I kw I will suffer, frankly I kw.
I am at a cross road. Perhaps I shld take wat fate has for me

[evianwater]

Originally Posted by tantan1234

If I managed to salvaged I kw I will suffer, frankly I kw.
I am at a cross road. Perhaps I shld take wat fate has for me

I am sorry to hear your situation

but there is really no good outcome i guess, you stay you suffer like you say. split up and also painful

but perhaps the split is a one time bad pain, then you can find someone else and build another life?

[joncheong]

Originally Posted by asdfghjkl

both likely its due to different background, e.g. local and a prc can mix well too!

I agree. Local guys marrying prc girls can be a good combination. Of cos i meant marrying decent prc girls and not those working in ktvs or the skin trade.

From my humble experience, although prc girls can be demanding and they want material satisfaction in life, but they will also make sure they fulfil their duty as a wife in making her husband happy. Perhaps due to upbringing. I once dated a rich shanghainese girl during a work stint there, although she got a temper, at the end of the day she will still be a gf and give you love and sex....

[notti4u]

Originally Posted by tantan1234

She makes more money than me, and the fact woman gets custody.


When she told me she has zero feelings for me, I was so knocked out. To be frank my feelings towards her has gone dwn too.
but instead of feeling relief or happy abt my freedom, i feel one kind.

Lost feelings, maybe just feel wasted why relations become like tat, and the process can be painful. Imagine when see her move out her stuff, and the wedding photos.

I don kw hw I shld feel anymore. But to salvage is also painful, characters cant change, some stuff and words she said already cracked the feelings I had for her.

If I managed to salvaged I kw I will suffer, frankly I kw.
I am at a cross road. Perhaps I shld take wat fate has for me

Bro, maybe she said in the fit of anger? Making more money doesnt mean will get the custody of the kids. If your kids are able to speak up for u, this will be a plus point. Sorry, am not lawyer so not able to tell you in greater details. But I know in fact that some of my colleagues does have the custody of his son despite the fact that his ex wife earn more than him due to his son said that he wants to be with his father. My wife always tell me that she got no feeling for me so cannot make love but still she is still staying with me and at times care abt me when I am sick or feeling frustrated.

Originally Posted by joncheong

I agree. Local guys marrying prc girls can be a good combination. Of cos i meant marrying decent prc girls and not those working in ktvs or the skin trade.

From my humble experience, although prc girls can be demanding and they want material satisfaction in life, but they will also make sure they fulfil their duty as a wife in making her husband happy. Perhaps due to upbringing. I once dated a rich shanghainese girl during a work stint there, although she got a temper, at the end of the day she will still be a gf and give you love and sex....

Bro, not all PRC are good. One of my provider staff actually married a PRC and she did provide sex for him when he need it but she goes out and work in a massage palour and keep asking him for money to buy things back to her hometown and he owes bank a lot of money. In the end, his wife run away from him and went back to China leaving him to clear the debts. I have to say he is blinded by love.

[Babe8008]

Some guys out there are lamenting tat they have so little sex like 2x a month...haha... My husband only want sex 2x a year .. Now... U guys muz be wondering WHY?.i know wat u guys r thinking of ..." Maybe I'm fat, ugly n unattractive"???

[tantan1234]

Originally Posted by notti4u

My wife always tell me that she got no feeling for me so cannot make love but still she is still staying with me and at times care abt me when I am sick or feeling frustrated.

Bro ur wife say no love u u can take it? FOr yr case maybe she joking, since she cared for u.


Ya. My case leave also pain stay also pain. Haiz.....
I look at my kid. Feel sad she cant live with me anymore.

[notti4u]

Originally Posted by tantan1234

Bro ur wife say no love u u can take it? FOr yr case maybe she joking, since she cared for u.


Ya. My case leave also pain stay also pain. Haiz.....
I look at my kid. Feel sad she cant live with me anymore.

Bro, maybe but i know when i touch her, she will scream at me...

I know woman heart are soft... they tends to say things they do not mean it...... just cool things down first and see how its goes first.....

[Birdietan]

Bro take things easy if u want your kids to be with you
For me I will only treat woman as a whore and if you can fuckoutside just do it don't ill treat yourself

[LovePotion]

can endure just endure... no matter what must think of the kids first

[tantan1234]

Originally Posted by LovePotion

can endure just endure... no matter what must think of the kids first

Yes I thought of endure all the way.
Just for the kid.

But I tink back. I am mid 30.
Many yrs more.
Is it better to cut now or maybe let's say at age 40plus when kid is 10 plus yrs?
There would be alot of explanation and our youth would also be wasted.
Frankly i think it is gamble. Unless she wakes up and change some of her ways. But I doubt as she is those type of person who nvr admits her mistake.



I hate to be in this type of cross road. This type of decision making.Sian

[Common]

Newbie here.

After being married for 14 years I can certainly relate and empathize with the bros who post in this thread. In my case the first sign of trouble was already during honeymoon, when we ML only 2 times. I always thought couples would be going at it like rabbits during honeymoon. She complained pain la.

I think every year since then average also less than 8x ML a year