Been single for more than 10 years

[Beasty]

Money may bring physical pleasure. But after the deed always feel empty. It is different from having a girl to love and her loving you back in return.

[cheesepotato]

Originally Posted by jnudes

Hi bros and sis,

This year I am 35 years old. I have been single since June 2002 until today. After the breakup did tried several attempts to court gals but unsuccessful. Either one of us did not like each other or we both have high demand. In summary no love destiny for us.

To release the stress of broken heart I also tried cheonging at Thailand, watch porn and have almost everyday PCC at home. I also visit spas, MPs and freelancers for their sex service, about few times in a year.

The older I get I just feel marriage is starting to become obsolete as more and more couples are getting divorce. I got to know two ex-classmates (one male & female) already divorced. This for me influenced me in certain ways and make me look more on negative side on marriage.

Actually I am doing fine in my everyday life. Working and sleeping alone. And in my free time I also go walking at park alone. Not really expecting or chasing anyone. Marriage is unthinkable for me now. I just feel single life give me more freedom and independent life that I truly enjoyed.

The purpose of this post is not to find new gf thru SBF or gain sympathies from members here. I just want to know humble opinions from single bros and sis on how they cope with their everyday single life.

Thanks for reading this and sharing your opinion.

bro jnudes, i'm not sympathizing with you, but i understand that sometimes, you will feel totally shite because of your situation.

i dunno if you ever thought about it but i think that you are in the greatest moment of your life right now to do whatever you want. go backpacking, travel, embrace culture. you will see the world for what it really is instead of our very narrow lives.

NEVER let the downfalls of others affect you and never let them judge you. No one has that right to. You are your own man and i firmly believe that if you can admit your shortcomings now, you are ready to change. Lead your own life instead of being afraid to fail. Nothing in this life worth having comes easy so I do hope that you find your golden path one day.

[jnudes]

Originally Posted by cheesepotato

bro jnudes, i'm not sympathizing with you, but i understand that sometimes, you will feel totally shite because of your situation.

i dunno if you ever thought about it but i think that you are in the greatest moment of your life right now to do whatever you want. go backpacking, travel, embrace culture. you will see the world for what it really is instead of our very narrow lives.

NEVER let the downfalls of others affect you and never let them judge you. No one has that right to. You are your own man and i firmly believe that if you can admit your shortcomings now, you are ready to change. Lead your own life instead of being afraid to fail. Nothing in this life worth having comes easy so I do hope that you find your golden path one day.

Sometimes I see myself as a weirdo; going out alone, eating out alone, shopping alone and even cheong alone.

So weird that I dislike meeting friends or relatives that have been married and have kids, either still a baby or grown up kid and always avoid them whenever I can.

YES I agree I have been in my own destiny - 100% freedom over the last few years. And I am proud of that and no regrets until today.

I also know that at my age, 99% of the time there will be concerned relatives or friends asking me when I will get married. I just answer them I don't think about getting married and its not my concern right now.

For Asian culture especially for Chinese male they have big pressure and responsibility to get married at my age. While for Chinese females they have less pressure to get married. For me I just ignore it and live my own single life.

As for me I see no different between single and married. Get married and divorce later. So I ask myself WTF? Isn't marriage should be long lasting and give a good impression for single people like me. But unfortunately not every marriage can work out happily and the best solution is divorce.

[jasdude]

Originally Posted by jnudes

As for me I see no different between single and married. Get married and divorce later. So I ask myself WTF? Isn't marriage should be long lasting and give a good impression for single people like me. But unfortunately not every marriage can work out happily and the best solution is divorce.

Honestly marriage is not for everyone until they meet the destined one. Nothing to fear about or lament about because at the end of the day you will still feel empty without love and belonging. Learn from every failed relationship to better yourself. Marriage is just an acceptance of responsibility whereas a relationship is more of compromises and sacrifices. Food for thought.

[cheesepotato]

always two sides of a coin bro. from what you say, sounds like you got CNY problems from relatives too!

i personally think that you know what's best for yourself already just that sometimes you get into an emotional rut.

take care though!

[owl888]

Originally Posted by jnudes

Sometimes I see myself as a weirdo; going out alone, eating out alone, shopping alone and even cheong alone.

So weird that I dislike meeting friends or relatives that have been married and have kids, either still a baby or grown up kid and always avoid them whenever I can.

.

U shd not cheong alone, in SBF itself there r not for profit outings where I meet new friends. Most of them singles like u & me. Good to share around good lobangs. Who knows maybe he introduce his sister to u

[Another]

Personally, I feel that there's nothing wrong with wanting to be alone. As long as you can be happy, alone or with a significant other, it doesn't make much of a difference. It also depends heavily on a person's personality, whether one leans more towards being an introvert/extrovert.

So, chin up, figure out what makes you happy, it's okay to be slow.

[peanodood1337]

Originally Posted by Jamester999

800 per month. so it's like they will take care of ur 1)food 2)lodging 3)msic things 4)medical ah ?

wah .. let's say 30-40 yr from now, the cost maybe at least 3-4 times .....
around 3000 maybe.

die lah

anyway that link is what ? cant access ..

The link is $$$$$$$. Not sure why its blocked here.

Cat 1 only provides basic care. You must be generally healthy, and able to function independently. If you have chronic illnesses, the other categories can cost a few times more (depending on your conditions).

If inflation goes up that high, well, can't be helped. Take loans to check into a nursing home, and die without settling your debts

[peanodood1337]

Omg I can't even type t-i-n-y-u-r-l here. wtf censor...

[MrSoapy]

Nothing wrong to be single but being single is not easy especially when age is catching up. You'll gradually see all your close friends one after another got attached, married and have kids. They no longer have time to meet up with you due to their own family committments and problems to settle each day and weekends. There will be times when you just feel like chating with those friends of yours but when you give them a ring asking if there are free for a meet up, they will turn you down most of the time as they will prefer to go out with their gf rather than you as a guy. Which guy in this world is not "chee hong" anyway right?

In the end, we singles will most of the time ended up eating alone, walking alone, shopping alone, watching movie alone, cheonging alone, drinking alone, dining alone etc. Most of the time all these lone ranger activities even have to perform during leisure oversea trips unless you are fortunate to have some brothers here willing to meet up with you and cheong together. It's a lonely path for singles to take. But having said all these, we single will always enjoy many freedom which all married or attached men find it difficult to attain easily unless they smuggler out under their wifes or gf's nose. We single can simply go anywhere and do whatever we like with no constrain. We have no other family burden and worries except for our own aging parents. We come and go as we please and there's no need to consider the wife or gf's feelings, likes and dislikes. We single are not tied down by all those $$$ issues and worries in supporting your wife, kids or gf's materialistic needs. We earn enough and spend enough to please ourself. We can always save up for 2 oversea trips each year to release our needs and get the experience the kind of fun and wild life abroad.

If you really want to get attached and married in S'pore, you'll be prepared for a tough journey ahead with all sort of $$$ issues and burdon of your wife, kids, housing etc. The environment in S'pore is no longer conducive to have a family as compared to 10 years back. Life is getting more tough even for those single to survive each day. Just think about what if you lost your job one day but still got a wife, kids to feed and housing loan to service? Our government no longer listen and care about how local S'poreans able to survive here. They just want the easy way out by bringing more foreigners here to spend more money, buy more property to sustain our economy thru consumer spendings so that they can pay themselves sky high salary.

Do you think married men can really retired comfortably in S'pore after they paid up their housing loan, kids education, medical bills etc? Think twice if you really want to get attached and married with all these worries that are going to haunt you in the near future.

[muscleboi]

bro MrSoapy, i hear you loud and clear. i agree with what you mentioned. for refresher, check out do-not-marry.com before considering marriage.

the objective of marriage is to have a family aka family warmth...but in this modern world we are all so busy working to make a living that getting married and re-producing is just to create more modern slaves to keep the economy going..

marriage no longer brings as much happiness as before. in fact, it brings us more stress...especially for us guys. remember losing our job doesnt only equate to losing our job..it can possibly mean losing our "family" through divorce or separation...yes, the "family" particularly the wife whom vowed to go through thick and thin with you. marriage is a facade of happiness in front of friends and relatives..

so is marriage really good and being single really that bad? think again.

[jnudes]

Originally Posted by MrSoapy

Nothing wrong to be single but being single is not easy especially when age is catching up. You'll gradually see all your close friends one after another got attached, married and have kids. They no longer have time to meet up with you due to their own family committments and problems to settle each day and weekends. There will be times when you just feel like chating with those friends of yours but when you give them a ring asking if there are free for a meet up, they will turn you down most of the time as they will prefer to go out with their gf rather than you as a guy. Which guy in this world is not "chee hong" anyway right?

In the end, we singles will most of the time ended up eating alone, walking alone, shopping alone, watching movie alone, cheonging alone, drinking alone, dining alone etc. Most of the time all these lone ranger activities even have to perform during leisure oversea trips unless you are fortunate to have some brothers here willing to meet up with you and cheong together. It's a lonely path for singles to take. But having said all these, we single will always enjoy many freedom which all married or attached men find it difficult to attain easily unless they smuggler out under their wifes or gf's nose. We single can simply go anywhere and do whatever we like with no constrain. We have no other family burden and worries except for our own aging parents. We come and go as we please and there's no need to consider the wife or gf's feelings, likes and dislikes. We single are not tied down by all those $$$ issues and worries in supporting your wife, kids or gf's materialistic needs. We earn enough and spend enough to please ourself. We can always save up for 2 oversea trips each year to release our needs and get the experience the kind of fun and wild life abroad.

If you really want to get attached and married in S'pore, you'll be prepared for a tough journey ahead with all sort of $$$ issues and burdon of your wife, kids, housing etc. The environment in S'pore is no longer conducive to have a family as compared to 10 years back. Life is getting more tough even for those single to survive each day. Just think about what if you lost your job one day but still got a wife, kids to feed and housing loan to service? Our government no longer listen and care about how local S'poreans able to survive here. They just want the easy way out by bringing more foreigners here to spend more money, buy more property to sustain our economy thru consumer spendings so that they can pay themselves sky high salary.

Do you think married men can really retired comfortably in S'pore after they paid up their housing loan, kids education, medical bills etc? Think twice if you really want to get attached and married with all these worries that are going to haunt you in the near future.

I stopped ringing my married friends over the last 5 years. Got sick of those rejection and excuses. Once they are married and have kids, they ignore you completely. I supposed this is normal human nature. Family is always number one.

Bro, there's one more you forgot to add: we singles will die alone if we choose to be single forever. Now I treat marriage as a business where almost everything from marriage ceremony to giving birth and raising kids need money. And it is expensive to live especially with a materialistic gf or wife. While I must admit cheonging with a WL is so much cheaper and without any commitment.

Luckily I am not from SG and I dun intend to live there as the city too stressful for me. With the current hardship there is no one else to blame but the citizen themselves. And btw one cannot separate suicide and sin city from the society. And it will continue on as long as the current govt is in power.

[jnudes]

Originally Posted by muscleboi

bro MrSoapy, i hear you loud and clear. i agree with what you mentioned. for refresher, check out do-not-marry.com before considering marriage.

the objective of marriage is to have a family aka family warmth...but in this modern world we are all so busy working to make a living that getting married and re-producing is just to create more modern slaves to keep the economy going..

marriage no longer brings as much happiness as before. in fact, it brings us more stress...especially for us guys. remember losing our job doesnt only equate to losing our job..it can possibly mean losing our "family" through divorce or separation...yes, the "family" particularly the wife whom vowed to go through thick and thin with you. marriage is a facade of happiness in front of friends and relatives..

so is marriage really good and being single really that bad? think again.

As far as I am concerned, current marriage means making friends with over 500 friends in Facebook although the person also has little baby to take care. They had little time to keep in touch even with close relatives. A mother or father supposed to take care of their family after married and after the existence of Facebook looks like keeping in touch with friends had became their number one priority. They don't know how their neighbour look like or what their occupation is, getting hooked on Facebook and social networking has become a new culture for the current SG society. Sad but true.

[Oysterpay]

This is a great thread.

I actually enjoy being single more than I do with someone together.

It may be lonesome at times.but peace comes with it as a package.

Being with someone makes u on top of the world for days then rise and fall for years.

Ppl who choose to be single and loner not necessary miserable.

They are someone who realize in this era,

爱情=痛，

痛=更痛

更痛=分离

分离= $$,time,心, along with many other precious thing gone.

To be loner is hard.to choose to be a loner is harder.

[LengKia]

Originally Posted by jnudes

Hi bros and sis,

This year I am 35 years old. I have been single since June 2002 until today. After the breakup did tried several attempts to court gals but unsuccessful. Either one of us did not like each other or we both have high demand. In summary no love destiny for us.

To release the stress of broken heart I also tried cheonging at Thailand, watch porn and have almost everyday PCC at home. I also visit spas, MPs and freelancers for their sex service, about few times in a year.

The older I get I just feel marriage is starting to become obsolete as more and more couples are getting divorce. I got to know two ex-classmates (one male & female) already divorced. This for me influenced me in certain ways and make me look more on negative side on marriage.

Actually I am doing fine in my everyday life. Working and sleeping alone. And in my free time I also go walking at park alone. Not really expecting or chasing anyone. Marriage is unthinkable for me now. I just feel single life give me more freedom and independent life that I truly enjoyed.

The purpose of this post is not to find new gf thru SBF or gain sympathies from members here. I just want to know humble opinions from single bros and sis on how they cope with their everyday single life.

Thanks for reading this and sharing your opinion.

franking speaking, tying the knot is not always the best for some men
Some people regret getting married whereas some miss the chance of their life

I missed the day when i'm alone doing things