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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #31  
Old 28-11-2009, 01:26 AM
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etct88 etct88 is offline
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

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Originally Posted by PuTonRen View Post
It seems like you have made up your mind......... You are here seeking support on what you wish to do...........................May I seize this opportunity to wish both of you happy.
Agreed with your assessment, let's wish them all the best....
  #32  
Old 28-11-2009, 10:19 AM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

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Originally Posted by virginboy View Post
So really, isn't there any successful cases? Must every story be a sad ending? Why is it that our forefathers can manage multiple wives, and we can't?
Found from another webpage:

"Early Christians invented ideas that women were “full of sin” and man was better off to “never marry.” Since this would be the end of mankind these same people compromised and said “marry only one.”"

"Jesus was not known to have spoken against polygyny. As recent as the 17th century, polygyny was practiced and accepted by the Christian Church. The Mormon church (Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints) has allowed and practiced polygyny in the United States."

Nevertheless looking at the trend - Women first ask for Monogamy then now having FB is common then more are saying if man can do polygyny why not them.

I guess polygyny may be back - but it may be the other way round.

Btw TS, it take someone with "real" big power to change some society rules and by looking back at our forefathers, it wont change or make us better of.



However, take my warning a bit, when there is no black & white time most women super very nice & sweet one ok. After the black & white OC will ask "why must you work so late, go find other woman SI BO?" instead of last time giving you a good massage liao

Think twice, one OC who will ask you such thing not enough SI BO? "wedding celebration in her hometown" getting one more to ask the same?????? OMG

Nevertheless & regardless wish you luck, bro
  #33  
Old 28-11-2009, 12:47 PM
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Ichigo_Kurosaki Ichigo_Kurosaki is offline
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

一方面是無休止的思念和她的呼喚
一方面是現實的無耐!!!
哎,,咋就沒有兩全其美的方法???

还是选择留在原地, 彼此做个无悔的选择:做个超越灵与肉的红颜知己,也很好啊!

尽管不能彼此相依相守,尽管不能彼此拥有,但这种精神上的寄托和情感上的安慰,那份淡而绵长的爱和美丽的感 情会永远置于心底让我们时时的回味,永久的甜蜜,铭记一生。
  #34  
Old 28-11-2009, 02:28 PM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ichigo_Kurosaki View Post
一方面是無休止的思念和她的呼喚
一方面是現實的無耐!!!
哎,,咋就沒有兩全其美的方法???

还是选择留在原地, 彼此做个无悔的选择:做个超越灵与肉的红颜知己,也很好啊!

尽管不能彼此相依相守,尽管不能彼此拥有,但这种精神上的寄托和情感上的安慰,那份淡而绵长的爱和美丽的感 情会永远置于心底让我们时时的回味,永久的甜蜜,铭记一生。

My god, spent hours in checking the words in this post to understand the meanings but bros well said........

让我们时时的回味,永久的甜蜜,铭记一生 - if all FB of ours can understand and stick to this & even OC can appreciate - then the Hor Say liao
  #35  
Old 28-11-2009, 05:43 PM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

VB, your wedding dinner can be a closed door dinner for immediate family plus some uncles & aunties if you like.

It's nice to have a full blown relationship but not easy to give equal love. So, u must always remind yourself to have full control of the situation & a plan B or C. Her pregnancy will be a deal killer. She can take pills or other forms of control.

U do question about her future happiness, if that's the case. Let her go, u can always find another one as women will be tougher as she age.

If she really loves u & willing to go through this route then have a good discussion about all possibilities.

Good luck.
  #36  
Old 28-11-2009, 10:58 PM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ichigo_Kurosaki View Post
一方面是無休止的思念和她的呼喚
一方面是現實的無耐!!!
哎,,咋就沒有兩全其美的方法???

还是选择留在原地, 彼此做个无悔的选择:做个超越灵与肉的红颜知己,也很好啊!

尽管不能彼此相依相守,尽管不能彼此拥有,但这种精神上的寄托和情感上的安慰,那份淡而绵长的爱和美丽的感 情会永远置于心底让我们时时的回味,永久的甜蜜,铭记一生。
Bro, reading like a love poem, well said for the situation here and well organized, you write yourself ? Your mandarin must be dam solid, really is what our govment required
  #37  
Old 29-11-2009, 04:14 PM
SioGan SioGan is offline
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

May I suggest that Singapore should allow men to have 4 wives, that would resolve a lot of problems for Bro here, yours truely included.

Joke aside I am sure a lot of people here have encountered the same problem as you before. Everyone's life is difference and to me it's hard to be rational when emotion is involved. Unlike other people here, I believe it's hard to judge what's right or wrong way to proceed from here. Being partially married to you (whom she consider a good man), maybe better off than marrying some scumbags in China. Good luck and do let us know what you decide to do.
  #38  
Old 29-11-2009, 08:18 PM
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virginboy virginboy is offline
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

Quote:
Originally Posted by see see only View Post
Found from another webpage:

"However, take my warning a bit, when there is no black & white time most women super very nice & sweet one ok. After the black & white OC will ask "why must you work so late, go find other woman SI BO?" instead of last time giving you a good massage liao

Think twice, one OC who will ask you such thing not enough SI BO? "wedding celebration in her hometown" getting one more to ask the same?????? OMG

Nevertheless & regardless wish you luck, bro
That is also my concern. Her behaviour now is really a A+++ type of girlfriend who can 出得厅堂,入得厨房, 爽在大床 that is why I fell in love with her and hesitant to break off. However I don't know if she'll turn into Mdm Hyde after we are "married".

Last edited by virginboy; 29-11-2009 at 08:47 PM.
  #39  
Old 29-11-2009, 08:32 PM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

Quote:
Originally Posted by SioGan View Post
Joke aside I am sure a lot of people here have encountered the same problem as you before. Everyone's life is difference and to me it's hard to be rational when emotion is involved. Unlike other people here, I believe it's hard to judge what's right or wrong way to proceed from here. Being partially married to you (whom she consider a good man), maybe better off than marrying some scumbags in China. Good luck and do let us know what you decide to do.
Yes I also think that there are other people who have the same encounter, but so far, only bro Ichigo has shared with me his relative's story. I like to have more case studies before I can write a thesis on this subject.

Thanks for all the bros concern. Will certainly give a progress report here.
  #40  
Old 29-11-2009, 08:58 PM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

Any wedding celebration or customary marriage without ROM after a singaporean already ROM before is consider bigamy...This can be charge by the state prosecutor...Jail and fine sentence...Even a photograph is enough proof or a friend or somebody who attended the wedding as witness can lend you in jail...so pls do consider thrice before you act...check the law before you do anything...
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  #41  
Old 29-11-2009, 08:59 PM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

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Originally Posted by virginboy View Post
I like to have more case studies before I can write a thesis on this subject. ...
Wow..you going to do a 30k words thesis on this..What will be the title?

"Keeping A Mistress Abroad"
You only will interest the men only
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  #42  
Old 29-11-2009, 09:11 PM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

Quote:
Originally Posted by GeMiNiZzzzZzz View Post
Wow..you going to do a 30k words thesis on this..What will be the title?

"Keeping A Mistress Abroad"
You only will interest the men only
Yup I'm a MBA!
  #43  
Old 29-11-2009, 09:15 PM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hurricane88 View Post
Any wedding celebration or customary marriage without ROM after a singaporean already ROM before is consider bigamy...This can be charge by the state prosecutor...Jail and fine sentence...Even a photograph is enough proof or a friend or somebody who attended the wedding as witness can lend you in jail...so pls do consider thrice before you act...check the law before you do anything...
Ok so to protect my own interest, I shouldn't agree to a wedding celebration.
  #44  
Old 30-11-2009, 02:02 AM
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

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Originally Posted by virginboy View Post
For the past few years, I have been going to China regularly for business trips. Instead of engaging in paid sex, I got myself a girlfriend to keep me occupied whenever I am there. She's not a KTV girl or FL. She was an admin when I knew her, and now she's working as a tele sales. It was supposed to be a short term enjoyment, but we're going into our 3rd year of relationship, and I find that I love her more and more each day as time goes by. It has come to a point where I need to make a decision if I should break off with her, so that she can find a proper guy to get married, or I should make a commitment to keep her as my mistress. Age is catching up with her, so it won't be fair to continue our existing relationship like this. She is financially independent, but I still give her some money whenever I am in China. I'm defintely sure that her love for me is real. She has actually many suitors, and a few of them are successful local businessmen, making more money than me, but she has no interest in anyone of them. I am not her first boyfriend, but she said that she didn't really have that kind of feelings with her previous boyfriend. She felt that I can give her happiness and is mentally prepared to be my mistress and will convince her parents to accept her decision. Her only request from me is to have a wedding celebration in her hometown, so that her relatives don't gossip about her status. I know that some guys have one family in Singapore and one family in China. I don't know if this is really workable or am I asking for trouble. I like to hear from brothers who have such experience. Thanks!
Ask Tiger Woods about keeping a mistress and the result and repurcussions.
  #45  
Old 30-11-2009, 03:43 AM
DuaKaTsua DuaKaTsua is offline
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Re: Keeping A Mistress Abroad

TS Bro No One can Tell you what is rite anot. U got to decide or your ownself in the end. Can Not say go SBF got support use as EXCUSE for tis that decision you make. You can ask 1 million people but in end up onli ur ONE decision matter hope U understand.

Watever u chose You oso got 2 b fair to ur lao puo and tis tiong kok tsa bor. Your lao pu oredi there prolly oredi mother of ur children u tink she not impt? Family is veri impt end of day so must treasure wat you have. SOME Men like to tao chiak a bit but in the end must realise love or not wat is still ur Number one prioty.

U cannot keep tinking last time tis dat why we cannot go back. Lasttime no puay ki no tall office no fly around job u oso wont have chance 2 go mainland and keep a mistress by side. So thing change. Most time for better.

I remember last time when I suay han ghin na Kia onli time , my lao peh got affair o/s with other woman for long time. Cause family many prob and heart break de. B4 My grandpa got three wife . So My father and his bros follow .... Some of my uncle oso officially got two wife two house kind you tink no problem ? I always wonder why people like my mother and aunty just accept it like dat. Cause wether my lao peh or my uncle sum of dem the behavior not nice like beat wife kind think their lum par very big always rite. They think to tao chiak and have more than one wife is natural n good but realli lyk dat meh !??

Now I know is wrong. Is veri unfair 2 the wife and children of all side !!So now I can understand why as time improve ting oso must move 4wad and impove. last time mata tseng der kor now can not oso mah. Last time people like my lao peh and ah gong and uncles were Diff coz situatin diff but they oso loser leh. KNN Real ta por lang = behave lik tis meh? LUCKY Today diff.Thing get better. Law 2day y lyk dat onli allow 1 man 1 wife oso got reason lah. Woman this day as smart and good as us ta por lung so must be equal in eye of law and get same protection wo. I look at my sisters and my girl peng yews and I glad got such good ting so they not take advantage of by not nice n lar sup ta por.

I noe we all diff but I kio kway once in a while now next time if got luck got GF or even marry will never kio kway or have xiao lao por kind. Not say I better or wat but I chose lyk dat coz I know how people suffer coz of tis kind of unfairnes and lying n family unhappyness .

Bludder u sound lyk oledi mak up mind kind so we say wat oso no use one la. Any Ways agree that people life thinking all diferant so you know uself best and ur situaton best. Please b careful and tink deep deep abt people u care abt n who care abt u hor.. I oso hope u can be fair to yourself and all the people in ur life. if not nxt time regret is lagi painful sial Hope u good luck n happy life n marry
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