Gers Are Still Gers

[yinyang]

Originally Posted by _AXL_

...FHM struggles to hit 50k readership in its heydays, her world's circulation was 3 times of that ...if these books and magazines r so effective, wouldnt we all be filthily rich, happily married and enjoying a fulfilling sexlife???
but i do agree that in life, we must treat our women as equals. be patient with them cos they r different from us, both physically and emotionally. listening and emphatising ..but it has to be both ways. if a woman wants her way all the time and do not put in the effort to also reciprocate the same way, leave. u deserve much more than putting up with it. ..(regardless foreign or local)

Hit the nail.. and my sore point too. It's not just giving 1 end, and other taking -what I tried to miserably get across my offsfore folly.

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by yinyang

Hit the nail.. and my sore point too. It's not just giving 1 end, and other taking -what I tried to miserably get across my offsfore folly.

would u care to elaborate??? got a feeling that this is a complaint thread... not that it is a bad thing... felt so good after letting everything out last nite...

[yinyang]

Originally Posted by _AXL_

..got a feeling that this is a complaint thread...not that it is a bad thing... felt so good after letting everything out last nite...

Great to let it all out from your system... without losing audience. Else, being windy risks losing direction.

As for my folly, need to clear my cobwebs 1st. Gotta run now for outside meeting. Will find you here again sometime today... after I get past my IRAS return (ohhhh hurts....)

[Derelict]

Originally Posted by _AXL_

bro, i m sorry that yr views here r not taken with more respect than it ought to be given...

On the contrary brother. If it was so, I wouldnt be feeling what I am feeling now. Since there wouldnt be a dialogue at all. What I found fascinating is my 'inexperience' to the local content is being pushed to the fore. It seems I am being put in my 'place' (or sort of) as a fellow driver who is unlicensed to drive the local road let alone talk about the locals' skill. The contrasting point being talk about is me being singaporean and yet my future intended isnt from the same nation. There lies my dilemma. Whatever credence I have to say will be misconstrued or highlighted as a diatribe. All the anacdote therein, is being brushed off as cacophony. No, not feeling sorry but a fact I have to face within and without. Doesnt mean I will stop my advocation of having a soulmate, monogamous or whatever words to describe a solid relationship. Within or without the boundaries of ones birth place. I still feels the locals are being branded unfairly. Thus my due diligence is to see it justified whenst possible. I guess having ones eye peels to whats happening around me, my family as well as those I have come to call friends and associates will help enlighten that pursuit.

Edit: Thanks for taking the time to explain. It help me to refocus my objectives. Cheers mate.

[temperance]

Originally Posted by Derelict

On the contrary brother. If it was so, I wouldnt be feeling what I am feeling now. Since there wouldnt be a dialogue at all. What I found fascinating is my 'inexperience' to the local content is being pushed to the fore. It seems I am being put in my 'place' (or sort of) as a fellow driver who is unlicensed to drive the local road let alone talk about the locals' skill. The contrasting point being talk about is me being singaporean and yet my future intended isnt from the same nation. There lies my dilemma. Whatever credence I have to say will be misconstrued or highlighted as a diatribe. All the anacdote therein, is being brushed off as cacophony. No, not feeling sorry but a fact I have to face within and without. Doesnt mean I will stop my advocation of having a soulmate, monogamous or whatever words to describe a solid relationship. Within or without the boundaries of ones birth place. I still feels the locals are being branded unfairly. Thus my due diligence is to see it justified whenst possible. I guess having ones eye peels to whats happening around me, my family as well as those I have come to call friends and associates will help enlighten that pursuit.

Thanks for taking the time to explain. It help me to refocus my objectives. Cheers mate.

Bro,

You can start an entirely new thread for those seeking to widen their vocab liao.

Lao Shi Zao An~~~~~

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by Derelict

On the contrary brother. If it was so, I wouldnt be feeling what I am feeling now. Since there wouldnt be a dialogue at all. What rankled me the most is that my 'inexperience' to the local content is being pushed to the fore. It seems I am being put in my 'place' as a fellow driver who is unlicensed to drive the local road let alone talk about the locals' skill. The contrasting point being talk about is me being singaporean and yet my future intended isnt from the same nation. There lies my dilemma. Whatever credence I have to say will be misconstrued or highlighted as a diatribe. All the anacdote therein, is being brushed off as cacophony. No, not feeling sorry but a fact I have to face within and without. Doesnt mean I will stop my advocation of having a soulmate, monogamous or whatever words to describe a solid relationship. Within or without the boundaries of ones birth place.

Thanks for taking the time to explain. It help me to refocus my objectives. Cheers mate.

well, for a start, u can help by using simpler english to get yr point across. i pride myself to be quite adept at the language but when i was reading yr short passage, there were 1 or 2 occasions when i felt like reaching for the dictionary!!!

i totally understand where u r coming from. i m currently with a korean (only for a short period of time now) and i m totally bowled over by the experience. even though she has lived here almost all her life, she is decidedly different from all the girls i have been with, especially when compared to local girls. but that said, i have only experienced it for a short time only. i do not know what the future lies. if this goes down in flames as well, i will update u guys here.

she treats me like the focal point of her life, at least a very important part and i can see that she is making the effort before i do. she makes me want to reciprocate and treat her even better. n in return, because of what i did for her, she tries to better me. this past 1 1/2 weeks has been an exercise of sweetness. those with diabetic tendencies need not apply. that is the important part, i feel. she makes the effort first!!! is that a culture thingy? is that due to nationality? or that she hasnt reared her ugly head? i really do not know right now. all i know is that i just want to enjoy this!!!

does that happen with local girls, prc girls or m'sian girls??? no, not really... they treat themselves like some nice piece of meat, to be auctioned off to the highest bidder. more often that not, there are always more than one suitor, and they let u know about it, probably hoping that u will pull your socks up to your balls and buck up. well, such strategies usually backfire on me. cos i believe, if i m not the first and only choice for u, then u dont deserve my love. cos i know i will start the relationship on a bad foot, then why start in the 1st place???

so i really do emphatise with the bros here too!!! they do have a point about local girls, in general. not all, but most of them. however, yr principles of how to treat your partner, i feel that they r more than sound. i, for one, have learnt much from your postings in this thread. cheers, and have a nice day at work.

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by temperance

Bro,

You can start an entirely new thread for those seeking to widen their vocab liao.

Lao Shi Zao An~~~~~

my thoughts exactly!!! Derelict lao shi, sibeh chim ah!!!

[jng1103]

Originally Posted by _AXL_

if a woman wants her way all the time and do not put in the effort to also reciprocate the same way, leave. u deserve much more than putting up with it. likewise for any ladies out there who r reading this. therefore, i sincerely believe that if i cant do it myself, i would not expect others to do it as well. only when i can do it, do i expect my partner (regardless foreign or local) to do it too. that to me then, is spending our lives together.

Very insightful post. *clap clap*. Communication (at the same frequency) is a two-way traffic, but when there's a gap of IQ/EQ, how could u expect ur soulmate to be on the same page? Impossible...!!! If they take things for granted and play the "catch me if U can" game, are we, men, are like donkeys chasing for the carrots? Yes, there are donkeys aka Robert Chais around... no question ask

Your expectations are valid and rigid. However, I still hold the nerve shall I expect what U expected, coz end of the day, the sillypore women would knock on U with the "hey, I'm protected by women chamber. so, take it or leave it... or bear with it." So, are we at the losing end? U betya...

What is left for us? U tell me... I'm no longer sweat over the "happily married family" potraited by our govt or whatsoever family bonding that our sillypore govt has been pushing, I rather chase for things that are under my control, eg: my wealth and health

jimbo

[jng1103]

Ooooiiii... Derelict, ur "england" so "powderful" that I kept flipping for www.dictionary.com . Me low education leh... how to keep up with u?

jimbo

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by jng1103

[COLOR="Purple"]Very insightful post. *clap clap*. Communication (at the same frequency) is a two-way traffic, but when there's a gap of IQ/EQ, how could u expect ur soulmate to be on the same page? Impossible...!!! If they take things for granted and play the "catch me if U can" game, are we, men, are like donkeys chasing for the carrots? Yes, there are donkeys aka Robert Chais around... no question ask

i think the preconceived idea of the guy chasing a skirt sounds very ego boosting for the local girl. what she doesnt know (or probably stubbornly dont want to know) is that if i were to be this casanova pulling all the stops to sweep her off her feet, then i would have this propensity to do it to someone else!!! damn, they never think of that, no!!! let me rephrase that, she doesnt want to think about that cos she thinks she is the fairest of them all!!! come on, even prince charles cheated on diana with a donkey, what makes u so special that yr man wont stray??? be realistic, the way to a man's heart is through care and concern, make him feel how lucky he is, make him WANT to treat their women well, not HAVE to treat their women well!!!

Your expectations are valid and rigid. However, I still hold the nerve shall I expect what U expected, coz end of the day, the sillypore women would knock on U with the "hey, I'm protected by women chamber. so, take it or leave it... or bear with it." So, are we at the losing end? U betya...

i will be the first one to confess that my expectations r rigid! like i have said, i will ask my woman to treat me as her first and only choice if i can do it. i do. so far, only 1 woman had done it to me and i did reciprocate. not once did i attempt to stray or take a short, wild ride outside. she remains the person i love most in life, but alas we were not meant to be. quite often, i will drive by her office building to see if i can steal a glimpse of her, after 11 years. true love dont die. yes, i m stupid, i m naive. but i know what i want, and i do not settle for anything lesser. i intend to get married and not divorce. so it is a decision i will live with for the rest of my life. dont u think i should choose wisely and carefully???

ah, the women's charter... blanket protection!!! put up hastily by harebrained politicians who have tunnel vision, which translated to many get rich quick schemes. they dont see that, cos these same politicians make more than a mil a year and live comfortably in their own cocooned castles. do they know anything about the heartland??? my bloody foot, they do!!!

What is left for us? U tell me... I'm no longer sweat over the "happily married family" potraited by our govt or whatsoever family bonding that our sillypore govt has been pushing, I rather chase for things that are under my control, eg: my wealth and health

i suspect bro derelict posted his comments for guys like u. u sound so dejected and jaded. he is trying to show a bright side that u can work towards. like i have said, he might not have a clear insight on local girls, but his principles i feel r very sound and makes a lot of sense. i have gone through quite a lot too, and i have been pissed big time too. but we cannot give up. we must believe that there is someone out there for us, good enough for us to make us want to give up all our vices and strive to have a good life together. there is much more than health and especially wealth. i have seen and felt. for me, i would give up all my health and wealth for a happy family, any time, any day. please, dont give up!!!

[Derelict]

Originally Posted by jng1103

Ooooiiii... Derelict, ur "england" so "powderful" that I kept flipping for www.dictionary.com . Me low education leh... how to keep up with u?

Dear me...

Well, some are spelt in old english. When writting just write whats in the head lor. In fact got loads of mistakes if I dont do a cursory perusal on my yarn. Lol.

whenst = whence

advocation is not a word on its own but borrowed from the word advocate. 'advocation' is mostly used in courts. Its a noun to mean advocacy. So in some form its a word but not mainstream

My humble apology all the same. I will 'watch' myself next time.

<3

kind regards.

[jng1103]

Originally Posted by Derelict

advocation is not a word on its own but borrowed from the word advocate. 'advocation' is mostly used in courts. Its a noun to mean advocacy. So in some form its a word but not mainstream...

wow... are we talking to a lawyer here at SBF? it's so thrilling and reminds me of a fiction story written by our own SBF member on a fantasy to bonk female lawyer... oh... HOT HOT HOT

jimbo

[_AXL_]

Originally Posted by Derelict

Dear me...

Well, some are spelt in old english. When writting just write whats in the head lor. In fact got loads of mistakes if I dont do a cursory perusal on my yarn. Lol.

whenst = whence

advocation is not a word on its own but borrowed from the word advocate. 'advocation' is mostly used in courts. Its a noun to mean advocacy. So in some form its a word but not mainstream

My humble apology all the same. I will 'watch' myself next time.

<3

kind regards.

just a note, anecdote, wrong spelling, no charge this time...

cacophony was a very nice touch though...

and please remind me not to offend u next time...

[surfer888]

Originally Posted by Derelict

What I found fascinating is my 'inexperience' to the local content is being pushed to the fore. It seems I am being put in my 'place' (or sort of) as a fellow driver who is unlicensed to drive the local road let alone talk about the locals' skill. The contrasting point being talk about is me being singaporean and yet my future intended isnt from the same nation. There lies my dilemma. Whatever credence I have to say will be misconstrued or highlighted as a diatribe. All the anacdote therein, is being brushed off as cacophony. No, not feeling sorry but a fact I have to face within and without.

You are not missing too much in not having a relationship with a local. Having had North Asians and locals for long term relationships, I can say that they do definitely have some distinct traits but the deal remains very much the same... as you mentioned, they all want attention and respect... although varying degrees. Even within a single context, eg. local context, the amount of attention that individuals require is stretched over a wide gamut.

Also, it also depends on ourselves. How we act affects how they react and vice versa, thus some of us get along better with different people... ahh... people... we are talking about people and not machines after all as much as we try to generalize them.

[temperance]

I've been skimming thru the thread and was discussing it with a girl-friend on MSN and she raised some points which I think are pretty valid.

1) Girls expect to be dined at expensive and presentable eating establishments
Her Point: It's not true. I think that food is just food. No matter how much a meal cost, at the end of the day, it's just going to end up as crap. I don't mind eating at hawker centres or coffeshops, as long as the food is good. I've had 1st dates where we've went to eat cheap delicious food at hawker centres and we've had a great time. What makes up the date is not the nice restaurant or the good food. It's the company and conversation.

2) Local girls aren't willing to provide BJs for their men
Her Point: Sex isn't just about satisfying the man. Have you ever heard of how some men refuse to give cunninglingus to girls cos they think that it's unhygenic? If our pee holes are 'unhygenic', then how can you expect us to lick and suck at your pee holes without that same notion?
If you really really love blowjobs so much, then do the same for us. Chances are we'll reciprocate the favour and probably enjoy the whole process much better.

3) Gers always say "anything" and end up with black faces when you buy her just 'anything'
Her Point: If you have an idea of what to eat then don't ask us what we want to eat. How the hell do we know what to eat when I cant even decide what I wan to eat in a single foodcourt, let alone trying to guess what foods you'd like to eat? If you feel like having Jap, just say it out and we'll decide where to go. If I have something else on mind, I'll let you know and we'll see which is more feasible; e.g.: location, parking, pricing, crowd, etc.

The above are just some of the things that we've been discussing.

Hope it helps.